Kerr University™Stop Apologizing for Your Ideas in Meetings
Learn how to claim your contribution without the confidence-killing sorry.
The Apology Trap
You've noticed it, right? Someone shares an idea and starts with "Sorry, this might be crazy, but..." or "I'm probably wrong, but..." These verbal disclaimers tank your credibility before you even finish your sentence. Research shows that people who lead with apologies are perceived as less competent, even when their ideas are solid. The worst part? This habit is contagious. Once you apologize for one idea, you're more likely to do it for the next one.
Three Phrases That Replace Sorry
Instead of apologizing, try these stronger openers: "Here's a thought..." (neutral, confident), "I'd like to propose..." (assertive without arrogance), or "Building on what Sarah said..." (collaborative and direct). If you're genuinely uncertain, skip the apology and ask for feedback: "What do you think about this approach?" This invites input without undermining yourself. Notice the difference: you're not less humble or collaborative, you're just more professional.
Why This Matters for Your Career
Your boss and colleagues form opinions about your judgment based on how you present yourself. Constant apologies signal self-doubt, not politeness. People who speak with measured confidence get promoted faster, get heard in crowded meetings, and attract better opportunities. You don't need permission to have an opinion. You earned it through your experience and thinking.
This week: This week, catch yourself before you apologize for an idea. Replace it with one of the three phrases above. Notice how people respond differently when you own your contribution.
— Digby R. Kerr