Getting promoted over your former peers is one of the trickiest transitions in management. Handled well, you keep the relationships and earn authority. Here's how to navigate it.
Name the change openly
Don't pretend nothing's different. A brief, honest conversation — 'This is a change for both of us, and I want to do it well' — clears the air and shows maturity. Avoiding it makes the awkwardness worse.
Be fair and consistent
The fastest way to lose the team is favoritism toward old friends. Treat everyone fairly and consistently, and your former peers will respect you even when decisions don't go their way.
Adjust the friendship, don't abandon it
Frequently asked questions
How do I manage former peers?
Name the change openly, be scrupulously fair, and adjust boundaries while keeping genuine care.
What's the biggest risk?
Favoritism toward old friends — it erodes the team's respect fast.
Can I stay friends with people I now manage?
Yes, with adjusted boundaries and consistent fairness.
How can I handle this well?
Book a free 30-minute class to work on it 1-on-1 with Digby R. Kerr.
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